Script Fix

And now it is time to keep our appointment with That Indie Reviewer. Today's special script fix is of a movie so terrifying, so cruel, so foul, that the critics had no choice but to pan it. It is Abraham Lincoln vampire hunter.
OK, it's not bad per say but I see where the critics are coming from. Cartoonish action, poor CGI and cluttered story telling. Well I am here to set the story straight about how it can be a better film. Nothing revolutionary, but definitely entertaining and cohesive.

1. Keep to the story of Lincolns life, or more importantly keep to the novel it was based on (yeah, I bet you didn't know this was based on a novel). Keep the journal central to the plot because that's how this story was told, keep the companions he made, like Edgar Allen Poe and not the freed slave (who's name escapes me) and keep the stealth. Lincoln didn't go around telling everyone that he was a vampire and went on many successful missions but also had many failures. 
2.  Start with Lincolns birth, followed by his rural, impoverished upbringing,and show the transition from determined hunter to the conqueror of evil. A lot of tragedies happen in his life (the real Lincoln) and each should be reflected in many parts of the film. We have the opportunity to make a very serious drama as well as action/horror. 
3. Also remove the "villain", as it shouldn't be made personal by Abe hunting one vampire, it should be a vendetta with extreme prejudice, thus making it more contradictory when he must free the slaves, who also suffer prejudice at the hands of man.
4. The effects should be kept for less elaborate scenes. There shouldn't be a climax on a train, it should be a couple of hunts for vampires with some gruesome and realistic kills. Burton might be producing, but take some ques from him and use the models and creepy (Sleepy Hollow) imagery. 
5. Henry told Lincoln right off the bat that he was a vampire and is very willing to help Lincoln as he has no singular vendettas and seeks to defeat the 'evil' vampires. This then develops into a very trust heavy relationship as Lincoln trusts Henry enough to follow through with his plans of abolition during his presidency.
6. The civil war is started by the southern vampires after Lincoln wins the candidacy and eventually the office. We  must keep Lincoln in office and not make him a warrior, because most of the success of the war was done in the oval office.
7. The ending should be kept the same, with Lincoln turned into a vampire, Henry hunting down Booths and killing him and Lincoln surviving to meet JFK and Martin Luther King Jr. This is done because "some men are just too interesting to die. And this should be reflected in the film, Lincoln is not only a debater, President and emancipator, but a Hunter and a Warrior.

I realize that many of you will not have read the novel or seen the film and so is confused by what I am saying. But it is a guilty pleasure of mine for a reason. The acting is pretty good from the main characters, the vampires are done right, as well as given some cool updates and the fight scenes are very well done. And what can I say about the ax, it is now my favorite weapon to use against Vampires, zombies and a whole host of other creepy things. So it is a OK film at best, but I hope I might have fixed it well enough for the fans. Look out for my review of Sweeney Todd this week-end, you don't want to miss it.

Video by Joblo on youtube.